I hate this.

Wednesday, Aug. 15, 2007 @ 6:02 p.m.

I slept for 11 hours straight. Wow. I can't remember the last time I did that.

For the past few days, I've always woken up to a text message from JAG. But not today. I don't know what happened during our lunch "date" yesterday, but whatever it was seems to have completely turned me off to him. I sent, "Good afternoon, stud! How ya doing?", and he replied "Just working." And since I have absolutely nothing left to lose, I gave it one last shot, took the plunge, and asked, "Are you busy later on this evening?"

No reply whatsoever.

Okay... so I guess even just being friends is out. I'm sure I'll see him out and about in the future, but when I do, I'm just gonna say 'hi' to him casually, cordially, and nonchalantly. I'll get over it soon enough, hunk or no hunk.

I really have no idea what I did or said to turn him off so abruptly. All the times we met up, he instigated them. I never asked him out. He asked me out. And I thought we had a really great conversation during lunch, but I guess something ticked him off, gawd knows what. I never made any comments that even remotely indicated that I wanted to get married right away or anything like that (y'know, something desperate - which I'm not). I'm not psychotic. I would have killed by now myself if I were.

I really hope it's a case of "it's not me, it's him"... because if it's me, then I'd like to know what it is about me that apparently scares guys off or repulses them. *Sigh*...

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I hate this.