Parking spot bitch

Thursday, Mar. 17, 2005 @ 6:01 p.m.

GRRR I'm boiling mad.

We were at the grocery store just a couple of hours ago. The parking lot was full, so we waited for someone to leave. Someone eventually did. But wouldn't you know it... the moment he left, some idiot BITCH (who just arrived) just casually zoomed into it.

I honked like hell. I was LOUD. I pressed my hand against the honk and left it there for a LONG TIME, all while she was going into MY lot. She completely ignored me. I don't buy that she didn't realize I was honking at her. NOBODY didn't hear me. It was so blatantly obvious that she was trying to ignore me.

French Fitch got off the car in a rage and confronted her. All that BITCH could say was "It's not the only lot here". @#$^!$?%&kkkkk!!!!! I absolutely HATE people like her! But because French Fitch is pretty scary when he's pissed off, she got back into the car to back up. BUT... some other woman then decided to drive up and stop right behind her, and so she couldn't reverse. She just turned her engine off and left, trying her best not to look in our direction, and walked quickly into the supermarket.

I was PISSSSSED. Still am. As far as I recall, incidents like this has only happened to me 3 times. And all 3 times, they were by women. And all 3 times, I honked like hell as they STOLE my spot, but they just pretended (poorly) that they were deaf and/or blind. Now, why is that? Are females more likely to do that feigning-deafness-and/or-blindness thing? Is that a defense mechanism or something? I dunno. Maybe it's just because I just haven't come across male parking-spot thieves... who are perhaps more likely to do the middle-finger-with-four-letter-word salute than the feigning-deafness-and/or-blindness stunt. Whichever the gender, I $%@#ing HATE them.

It's weird how some trivial thing like this can make us so mad. Of course, we thought of doing something, like slashing her tires. But we didn't, because A) We didn't have any cutting/piercing apparatus; and B) It would be so obvious as to who slashed her tires, and if she remembered our license plate number, we'd get in trouble. Even though SHE STARTED IT. The only difference is that unfortunately, there's no law against what she did, whereas what we could have done would have been a misdemeanor.

I have a good mind to keep a small spray-bottle full of filthy water in the trunk of my car for such future incidences. Filthy, yuckky, stinky water that is sure to leave marks once they dry up. Then the next time some idiot pisses me off like this again, I can give their car a mud bath treatment. I don't think it would be a misdemeanor... it's not really vandalism, 'cos it's nothing permanent like paint or scratches. The car would just look like it hasn't been washed in months. In fact, after they're done being pissed off (An eye for an eye, baby!), it'll be a public service provided on my part... to get them to wash their crummy dirty cars. (Andrea: You and your friend Dena should definitely try it)

In fact, I think everyone should do this. That'll teach those ruthless parking-spot thieves. There should be a law against that.

And as an added measure, I'll learn to develop special powers that would allow me to get birds to poop at my command. Right on the offending car... a ton or so of pure, natural, fragrant guano. Muahaha!

Stupid bitch. *grumble*

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Parking spot bitch