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Friday, Apr. 23, 2004 @ 12:12 p.m.

Weekend. Ahh, that glorious, glorious word.

I've been through hell this past week with stress from exams and that little... umm, period thing. Turns out that I think I might be down with the flu. French Fitch is sick too, so we were two sick guys cuddled up on the couch watching TV for the better half of yesterday. It would have been much more romantic without the germs flying around... or the phlegm. Yes, I'm disgusting.

And I've decided that I'm going to spend a day as a cat. In other words, to de-stress myself and to get rid of this flu, I'm going to do nothing but eat, sleep, watch TV, sleep, nap, poop and sleep all day. Everything Smelly Cat does. Except for pooping in the litter box.

I read that airport security in the U.S. is still as poor as ever, as if September 11 hadn't happened. News articles like these always piss the shit outta me. They might as well print "Our airports are easy targets! Terrorists, attack here!" in the headlines of every newspaper in the world. This is ridiculous.

I remember the days just after September 11 happened, there were so many news reports where the news reporters themselves were standing at places and practically DECLARING to the public that the place was an easy target for attacks. Reports like "I'm standing at the parking structure at the Los Angeles Airport, where security seems very loose. This might be an easy target for car bombs". Seriously, tell the whole world about all our loopholes. And if an attack really happens, they'll once again go into the ridiculous finger-pointing fest (like they're doing now) and wonder how the terrorists managed to "outsmart" U.S. intelligence.

Speaking of war, I read this hilarious article in the February 2004 issue of MAD magazine entitled "MAD's Handy Glossary to the War on Terror". Here are a few U.S. definitions of certain terms they've been over-using:

  1. "Intelligence Failure" - Calling the war a "crusade", declaring the fight "over", inviting motivated killers to "bring it on", or whatever bone-headed Bush says next week.
  2. "Freeing the Iraqi People" - White House catch phrase #3, when it turned out "Weapons of Mass Destruction" and "Link to al-Qaeda" didn't work so good.
  3. "Bring it on" - Dubya's taunt to America's enemies, apparently meant to intimidate the sort of people who already blow themselves up with a smile.
  4. "Broad-based International Coalition" - 130,000 U.S. troops, and some guy from Bulgaria.
  5. "Mission Accomplished" - The White House definition of knocking over a Saddam statue.
  6. "Small Pocket of Protesters" - The entire continent of Europe.
  7. "The Hearts and Minds of the Iraqi People" - The gory stuff CNN doesn't show you, splattered all over the Iraqi rubble after people blow themselves up.

Heh. Funny shit.

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