PTSD

Wednesday, Aug. 24, 2005 @ 11:20 a.m.

Three days after the harrowing experience that is the MCAT, and I'm still not used to "life after death" yet. I'm still experiencing strange dreams. The day before, I dreamed that I was taking the exam again. Yesterday, I was with someone I didn't recognize, and we were quizzing each other with random topics. This morning I woke up with the words "keto-enol tautomerism" in my head (some organic chemistry crap).

To top it off, I've been waking up earlier than I usually do these past couple of mornings. And it's not the waking-up-refreshed type. It's the ow-my-eyes-hurt type. Yesterday I felt really tired around only 9pm. What in the world is happening to me?? Am I suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder?

The toll that this %$&*ing exam took on me is amazing. I took it so much more seriously than I've ever taken anything before in my life. Not just because it's a big exam. I had much more at stake than simply not getting into medical school (knock on wood). I have my entire future with French Fitch at stake. If I don't get into the few medical schools around here, I'll be forced to move (assuming that I do get in somewhere), and it'll be the premature end of the best relationship I've had in my life - and one that's still going strong. Sigh.

Anyway, I'm just trying to recover from all the stress I've been subjected to for the past few months. This includes telling my body constantly, "It's over! Quit it with the adrenalin!". I'm going to play some video games now... namely, "Crash Bandicoot - Twinsanity". It's so damn hard to get all those annoying crystals.

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